Journey of a Sufi

This is a good old idiom which is recognized as a social norm, to use the rod to correct the child’s behaviour by parents and teachers. But generations of human experience has disclosed the ill effects of thrashing and beating the child for any reason, rhyme or cause. It would have disastrous effect on the behaviour of the growing child, besides affecting the normal physical and psychological growth. It will create personality disorders besides causing many illnesses and allergy problems. The child in order to avoid beating, scolding and abuse, will adopt many defensive mechanisms. The child may become more stubborn, naughty and mischievous.

In modern times, child rights have been fully recognized. In western and advanced countries, child abuse is taken very seriously by law authorities. Several child care commissions have been set up under regulations. Modern psychologists and experts recommend counseling, childcare and various therapies.

But the best golden therapy is abundant showering of love and affection without making the child spoilt by excessive concern, love or fulfilling the child’s excessive desires at the drop of a hat.

The child has to be properly weaned as she or he grows, from temptations, desires and stubbornness to seek more pleasures.

Today, the expectation of parents are high. They create dreams for themselves and for the child by procuring admission for the child in renowned montessori’s and elite schools. They goad and pamper the child into expensive toys. When the child shows some indiscipline, the frustrated parents start abusing the child.

A normal, healthy atmosphere is required to be created in the home, play-school and outside environment for the child to grow normally. This would enable the child to acquire healthy habits. Temper tantrums and mischief of children has to be carefully dealt with.

In older days, grannies, aunts and uncles would be a source of great joy and happiness for the children. But in the present times, with both parents employed and lack of time to spare for the children, it has indeed become a serious issue about sparing more time for the care and development of the child.

In order to avoid social problems and child abuse, it is necessary to help to develop a healthy environment for the children.

“A child is the father of man and tomorrow, the future of the nation.” But all this depends on the healthy growth of a child.

Hazrath Abbas (RA), son of Abdul Muttalib and Prophet’s (Pbuh) uncle took part in the battle of Badr, along with his brother Abu Sufian as unbelievers. He was captured and brought as captive to Madina along with the other unbelievers and his hands were tied and he was put n fetters.

The story of his conversion to Islam and spiritual enlightenment is well documented in history. Maulana Jalaluddin Rumi (RA) in his book, “Fihi Ma Fihi” (Signs of the Unseen-the Discourses of Jalaluddin Rumi) recounts the confession of faith by Hazrath Abbas as follows: 

“It occurs to me to interpret a verse of the Quran, even if it is not pertinent to this discussion. Anyway, since it occurs to me now, I may as well say it out”

God said, “O Prophet, say unto the captives who are in your hands, if God hath known any good to be in your hearts, He will give you better than what hath been taken from you, and He will forgive you, for God is Gracious and Merciful”. (Surah 8, Ayat 70).

The reason for the revelation of this verse is as follows: The blessed Prophet had defeated the infidels. He took many prisoners and had them bound hand and foot. Among these prisoners was his uncle Abbas. All night along, the prisoners wailed in their fetters and bemoaned their miserable, wretched condition. Having given up all hope, they were waiting for the sword to end their lives, when the Prophet saw them and laughed.

“You see,” they said, “he does have humanity in him. The claim that he is not human is untrue, for here, seeing us in these bonds and fetters as his prisoners, he rejoices exactly as a carnal man would rejoice in glee if he had conquered his enemy and seen him vanquished.”

The Prophet, however read their thoughts and said, “Oh, No, I am not laughing because I see my enemies vanquished or because I am rejoicing at seeing you at a loss. I am laughing because with my inner eye, I see myself forced to drag with chains and fetters a group of people out of hell’s fiery furnace and black smoke into the eternal garden of heavenly paradise. They are bewailing and lamenting, saying, ‘Why are you taking us away from this place of perdition into that asylum and rose-bower?’ That is why I am laughing. Since you still do not have the power of vision to comprehend and see clearly what I am saying, God commands me to say this to you: ‘First you gathered many hosts and much might and relying totally upon your own strength, valour and might, you told yourselves that you would do this, and so would utterly vanquish the Muslims. You thought no was stronger than you. You could not imagine anyone mightier than yourselves. Now that all you had planned has turned out otherwise, and now that you lie trembling in fear, you have not repented of your malady and are in desperate straits. You still cannot conceive that anyone could be more powerful than you are. It is therefore necessary for you to see me in my might and power, and yourselves as subject to my wrath in order that things may be made easy for you. Do not despair of me in your fear, for I am able to deliver you from this fear and lead you to safety. He who can bring forth a black cow from a white one can bring forth a white cow from a black one.’”

“He causeth the night to succeed the day, and He causeth the day to succeed the night.( Surah 35, Ayat 13).
He bringeth forth the living out of the dead, and bringeth forth the dead out of the living.” ( Surah 30, Ayat 19).”
‘Now in your present state as prisoners, despair not of my presence in order that I may take you by the hand, for “none despaireth of God’s mercy, except the unbelieving people.” ( Surah 12, Ayat 87).

Then the Prophet continued saying, “Now God says, O prisoners, if you turn away from your former belief and perceive Me in both states of fear and hope and realize that you are subject to My Will in all conditions, I shall release you from this state of fear. I shall restore to you all your property that has been plundered and lost, nay, I shall restore it to you many times more. I shall pardon you and to your wealth in this world, I shall join the wealth of the next world also.”

“I repent,” said Abbas. “I have turned away from what I was.”

“God requires a token of this claim you make,” said the Prophet. “It is easy to lay claim to love. But the proof of it remains otherwise.”

“In God’s name,”asked Abbas, “what token do you require?”

“Give to the armies of Islam all the wealth you have left. If you have truly become a Muslim and wish well to the religion and community of Islam, give in order that the army of Islam may be strengthened,” said the Prophet.

“O Apostle of God,’ said Abbas, “what have I left? Everything has been plundered. I have not so much as an old straw mat left to my name.”

“See,” said the Prophet, “you still have not become righteous. You have not turned away from what you were. Let me tell you how much wealth you have, where you have hidden it, to whom you have entrusted it and in what spot you have buried it.”

“Oh no,” cried Abbas.

“Did you not entrust a certain amount to your mother? Did you not bury it under a wall and stipulate that if you came back, she was to give it to you and if you did not return alive, she was to spend it on a certain thing, give so much to a certain person and keep a certain amount for herself,” said the Prophet.

Abbas raised his finger and professed the faith sincerely, saying, “O Prophet, in truth I used to think that you had good luck through the machinations of fortune, as did many ancient kings like Haman, Shaddad and Nimrod. However, when you told me what you said, I know for certain that this good fortune is mysterious and divine in origin.”

“You speak the truth,” said the Prophet. “This time, I heard that girdle of doubt you wore inwardly, snap. The sound of its breaking reached that ear of mine that is hidden in the depths of my soul. Whenever anyone’s girdle of doubt, polytheism or infidelity snaps, I can hear the sound of it breaking with my inner ear, my soul’s ear. Now you have truly become righteous and professed the faith.”

Hazrath Abbas(RA) became one of the closest confidant and companion of the holy Prophet (Pbuh). His descendants established the Abbassid dynasty which ushered in a period of great prosperity, learning and expansion of Islam for over five centuries.

The first message to an unlettered Prophet (Pbuh) was “Iqra.”

Read in the name of the Lord and Cherisher
Who Created man, out of a leech like clot.
Proclaim! And Thy Lord is Most Bountiful
He Who Taught the use of Pen (Surah 96: 1-4)

Thus the Prophet (Pbuh) proclaimed that the “ink of the scholar is more holier than the blood of the martyr.”

When this is the beginning of the word of Lord Almighty and His light, to“ Noorulla,” the Messenger of Peace, it follows that education, law and justice precedes anything and everything in life. Reason shall rule and prevail over emotions. There shall be no attachment to honour, wealth, pelf and splendour. But loyalty, dedication should be towards the dictates of Allah and His word, His law and Prophet’s message.

For living a virtuous, peaceful and tranquil life, acquisition of knowledge is paramount and of utmost importance in Islam.

“Ignorance of law is no excuse” to escape from penal and penalty provisions. At every breath of life, intricate rules have been framed. Scholars shall interpret and make it known to the populace. The loyalty and integrity of the learned and the scholars shall at all times be for the law of the Universal King and His peaceful, trustworthy and truthful Messenger. Rule of law and sense of justice shall proceed each and every ruling. There has to be clear and just balance in the ruling. Good conscience and equity shall prevail. All are equal in the eyes of the law. Scholars shall not proclaim and give rulings to please the powers that be, or for cheap popularity or to gain wealth and recognition. The path of the scholar is strewn with thorns and a democles’ sword always hangs on his head, to speak the truth and to lay down his all, including if time gives a call, his life to help prevail just laws and justice.

Some scholars are known to betray people to help the autocratic powerful monarchs and for fear of life. This is an unholy and most cruel thing.

Cruelty is not just lack of compassion, mercy and benevolence, but it is also to tilt the balance in favour of the unjust and wicked, that brings chaos, lawlessness and which destroys eternal peace, happiness, tranquility and “as-sakina”.

Learning by each and every individual to know their rights, duties and to perform their legal obligations towards a just living and society is the primary and fundamental aim of Islam.

Every scholar, both religious and secular shall help in the maintenance of cosmic harmony, right living, right conduct, right speech and conducive living to bring in peace, justice, mercy and compassion in each and every individual’s life.

Purposeful prayers, equitable distribution of wealth, charity and correct performance of “salat,” good actions and deeds are by acquisition of knowledge. The scholars, teachers and ‘men of letters’ and pen, the learned, the wise, the poets, the philosophers, the judges and lawyers, the legislators and parliamentarians play a pivotal role in ushering in fair play, justice, equality, brotherhood and freedom from darkness between all the races of humanity.

There is a great responsibility on them to maintain equanimity, sense of justice, fair-play and honesty in applying the rule of law equally among all sections of the people.

With their mighty pen, the scholars should fight tyrannical rulers, state terrorism, trampling of human rights and suppression of oppressed and depressed.

Self- illumination and enlightenment of mind and heart is by acquisition and correct application of knowledge alone.

There are as many recommendations as there are ways of life and living to tackle anger, stress and strain in daily living. The holistic approach is to train the inner self to always remain calm and not to develop attachments to worldly things.

The management “gurus’ have their list of ‘do’s’ and ‘dont’s’ and have suggested remedies from deep breathing exercises to management of daily stress and strain in daily living. The psychologists have their way of dealing with this problem. They link this daily problem to personality disorder or inability to develop proper defense mechanism.

“Bursting anger, stress and strain,” in daily living is not as easy as the suggested remedies. Majority deal with this problem in their own individualistic way. Anger is an angst and reaction against something unpleasant to the self of man. Anger gets built up slowly and steadily or it is an immediate outburst of emotions. The outburst would be in the form of strong reaction against the person towards whom the anger is directed either by shouting or by use of abusive language or violence or by a simple stare. In most of the cases where there is no outburst of emotion, the anger builds up inside causing severe stress and strain. It may lead to emotional disorder or blood pressure or even diabetes and other related diseases. Most of the migraines, heart ailments are a result of continuous building up of anger, stress and strain.

As children, the temper tantrums and outbursts are short-lived and children tend to forget and forgive. They continue to play, sing, shout and make merry. This process of joy and happiness found in childhood slowly gets lost as the growing process takes place. The holistic approach is to recall the same child-like humour and attitude in adult and growing years to let out the built up emotions. To play games, take interest in music, extra-curricular activities, make pilgrimages, visit tourist jaunts, go for holidays and such things. But all cannot afford it. The life situation may not warrant such a luxury. The problems besetting a person may be such that it may not call for ‘quick fix’ solutions. It may be a long standing family feud, grave legal entanglements, indebtedness, loss in business and many such problems. Each individual may require different solutions to get rid of stress and strain and anger, built up due to several wrongs done to an individual over a period of time.

Prayers, meditation, patience, tolerance and not to lose hope and be always optimistic of good events to happen is another positive approach to remove stress, strain and anger and ill-feelings developing in one’s self.

The spiritualists would like to leave the matter to destiny and take each moment as a moment of joy and bliss. This is a very difficult approach and one needs constant strengthening of spiritual beliefs. This is by aligning oneself to some spiritual systems or ‘gurus’ who guide a person to deal with life situations.

There are yoga specialists, ‘peers,’ bishops, saints and umpteen spiritualists who show the way to tackle problems of life.

Whatever may be the methods and ways chosen by one to tackle the problems of life, one thing is quite clear that stress, strain, anger and ill-feelings should not be left unaddressed. It requires to be handled by an individual person by healthy means and wean it out to make life joyful, happy and blissful.

Character and good conduct are the key and glory of life. It is not enough in merely asserting faith in Islam.

Besides expression of certainty of faith in Allah and his Prophet (PBUH), every Muslim and every citizen is required to build high character and develop very good conduct in social, civil and public life. Every person should follow and walk in straight path and adopt righteousness and shun all the despicable behavior, bad manners by adopting correct posture. Good behavior, excellent character and good conduct is required to be cultivated from childhood. A great responsibility rests on the shoulders of parents, relatives and teachers in molding the character and conduct of a child. Thus education and knowledge therefore refines a person. “Tell me your friends, I will tell you what you are” is an adage. Company makes or mars a man. One should draw a line between good and improper behavior. One needs to caution oneself every now and then by self examination and self inquiry. Politeness and gentle behavior has to be practiced day in and day out. For which patience and fortitude is necessary. All these things can be achieved by developing compassion and kindness in one’s self. Remembrance of Allah, of His Bounties and filling the heart with His awe, wonder and fear will help in cultivating good manners and developing good character and conduct.

The life of Prophet (PBUH) is an excellent model for us to emulate. Holy Quran vouches for the excellence of Prophet’s life and commands every Mussalman to follow the footsteps of our Prophet (PBUH). Then we have the lives of Prophet’s companions and saints to guide us forever and ever to live a virtuous and good life.

For one to develop sterling character, one needs to have before him a great personality like our Holy Prophet (PBUH) and saints for guidance. The need to purify oneself everyday, every moment and every breath is necessary. To develop remorse and repent for past sins, mistakes and bad behavior and every moment think of improving oneself for better and better perfection of one’s own self. You have to be your own policeman to check the evil tendencies in your mind, heart and soul and for its purification. Therefore love and love alone can bring a change in the character and conduct of man.